Intro (Click to reveal)

(Intro music)

End Intro

(Tape recorder sounds)

D

Are you ready for another spooky tale from the beyond? (Evil laughter)

Are you ready for another spooky tale from the beyond? (Evil laughter)

(Knocking sounds)

Mark

(Far away) Cole?

D

No, just me.

Mark

Oh, hey, D. Where's Cole? He told me he wanted to show me how to record, uh, the submission.

D

He left about like 20 minutes ago.

Mark

Oh right. Okay. Um, alright, well I guess I'll just kind of be...

D

No, no, no, no. Nope. Wait. He told me to give you this.

(Footsteps)

Mark

What's this?

D

The submission he wants you to record today.

Mark

Record? He didn't say anything about actually submitting a recording today?

D

Well, he told me to give you that and to tell you how to record a submission. So I, I think he wants to actually have you read it.

Mark

Well, did he say when he was gonna be back or anything?

D

No, not at all. He just muttered something about an errand he had run before the store closed or whatever, something like that, and shoved these papers into my lap.

Mark

Oh, so I just record it then?

D

Yep. See that button, The one with a big circle on it?

Mark

Oh yeah. The moon button.

D

The moon button?

Mark

Yeah. The one with the moon on it.

You know, for nighttime listening next to the arrow button. I don't know much about that one, but it looks like an arrowhead.

D

Mark. You're...

Mark

Joking, yes. Yes. I'm joking.

D

Oh, Oh thank God. Okay.

Mark

So that's it then.

D

Basically, yeah. Here, I'll, I'll just run you through what he told me.

Mark

All right. Wait. You've been recording this whole time?

D

Uh, I was practicing.

Mark

Practicing. What?

D

Well, I figured if people are gonna be hearing me, I should practice a little, you know, my, my narrator's voice.

Mark

Yeah. Sounds awful, doesn't it?

D

Right? Sounds one way in your head when you're talking and then it's like completely different when you hear it recorded and played back. Just, agh.

Mark

Yeah. Yeah. Ugh. Do we need a fresh tape then, or we good?

D

Nah, don't worry about it. Cole said we could just edit it out before he releases it. So I think we're fine. Just hit the brick button and start it back up when you're ready.

Mark

Huh? See what you did there. Nice little call back.

D

Yeah, I thought it was pretty clever myself.

(Footsteps)

Mark

Entry 004. Submitted, written on uh, yellowed paper by a typewriter. Original exchange dated, April 28th, 2010. Um, author, unknown.

Do you believe in God? I never did. How could a bearded man create the world in seven days and seven nights? And why does he have such an itchy looking beard if he could just blink it away?

I once asked a friend how he knew God existed, and he just smiled thinking it was his chance to convert me, and said, because he has faith. I then asked him how he had faith in God, to which he replied, because I believe in his righteous and almighty love. So once again I asked him, But how if you've never seen him?

At this point, my friend was becoming annoyed with me and said, because I just know. I then began to smile, as I asked him how he could have faith, if he knew there was a God. He just looked at me blankly as if the thought had never crossed his mind or he simply couldn't understand. So I continued. You can't have faith in something if you know it's true.

I was so proud of myself. I thought I was so smart. I walked away proudly proclaiming that no person can be certain of anything as there are no absolute truths and a leap of faith requires the absence of proof and certain knowledge. Implying that he had argued himself into a corner when really he was just trying to share with me what I'd asked for.

Looking back, I wasn't being smart, was only being arrogant and condescending. I've always thought of myself as a logical person. I prided myself on it, and of course I couldn't know for sure what happened after death, but I was pretty convinced there was nothing. And then I died, in the most underwhelming way possible.

I guess that's the thing though, right? You never realize just how close you are at any given point of any given day to taking one wrong step, leaning too far the wrong way, and dying. During the commercial break, I rushed to the kitchen to grab a bag of crisps. And wouldn't you know it, I stepped right in that little bit of water I'd spillt having completely forgotten about it, and my feet slid out from underneath me.

I don't remember anything after that, but I was told that I hit the back of my head on the edge of the table. Luckily, the old lady living next to me who had been given a key in case of emergencies by the previous tenant, found me on the floor bleeding out and called an ambulance. I died on the way to the hospital, only for a minute before they resuscitated me, but that part I remember vividly. The being dead, I mean not the resuscitation.

I knew I was dead, but I wasn't afraid. I just accepted the fact coldly and felt no compassion for myself. It didn't make me happy or sad. I just knew I was no longer living. A-and I remember a light, like the one you see when you, uh, rub your eyes too hard, but it faded away as if it were rushing at a thousand miles per hour in the opposite direction.

I was under the impression I was supposed to go to the light, but that felt impossible. How could anyone go into the light when it moved so fast? But then once again, I knew and felt no empathy or compassion for myself. I just knew the light wasn't meant for me.

I dunno what I'd done in my life that had been so terrible, but then again, I just accepted the fact that I'd done nothing good with my life either and probably never would. Knowing that didn't make me happy or sad either. I just accepted the fact. I had a sense of weightlessness. I called out a great big "Hello!" Shouting it loudly to see if anyone responded, but no sound came out of my mouth and I could feel no breath leave my lungs.

It felt like an awfully long time that I hung there, able to move, but frozen in place, completely weightless with nothing to look at, and no one to talk to until I heard someone call out to me.

"Hello." Said a voice. "How are you liking it?" It was a polite voice, like the voice of someone who knew how to deliver bad news gently.

"How am I liking what?" I tried to reply, but I could make no sound and without sound, almost as if he could read my mind. He replied. "Hell."

Hearing that word made me feel a momentary shock. The first human emotion I felt in what seemed like an awfully long time.

"I know. I know the fire and brimstone. Where is it? Trust me. I liked it much more before."

That's when I began to choke in the absence of air to breathe. As if the sensations of being human and having a body lagged behind my consciousness.

"It seems that given time, loneliness is far more terrifying than pain. Physical pain you can get used to, but the longer you are lonely, the worse it gets. A little cruel if you ask me. But despite our disagreements, I still have to take orders from the big man upstairs. Isn't that funny? Eh? Just when you think you've-" I woke to an EMT holding paddles in his hands, interrupting the voice, and my entire body felt like it was laid out on ice.

I never believed in God, but knowing the devil does, It's proof enough for me.

(Tape recorder sounds)

Mark

So D uh, what do you think? As one who was as well practised as you? Uh, how was my narrator voice?

D

You did great.

Mark

Naturally.

D

First take and everything. It's very impressive.

Mark

Well, if I'm being honest...

D

Go on.

Mark

I was sort of hoping that Cole was gonna ask me to record a little.

D

Oh, you were, were you?

Mark

Yeah. I thought it'd be fun, you know?

D

Well, would you look at that cool guy Mark, coming in hot, acting like he wasn't prepared and there he was ready to rock and roll.

Mark

Well, it wasn't quite like that. I mean,

D

Record? Who me? Little ol' me? Well, if I must.

Mark

Okay. Yeah, you caught me fine.

D

Yeah. Red-handed.

Mark

Guilty as charged.

D

So, Mark, ready for the punishment for this capital crime?

You gotta give a listen.

Mark

Oh, no, no, I'm good, I'm good.

D

No, no, no, no. Nope. We're gonna listen back together and I'm gonna sit here and enjoy the physical pain I see in your eyes as you hear your voice on playback.

(Tape recorder sounds)

Outro (Click to reveal)

Mark

Tiny Terrors is an anthology horror podcast produced by Pulp Audio and licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.

D

This episode was directed by Cole Weavers, with sound production and editing by Mike LeBeau.

Mark

To find additional information or to join our Patreon for additional content and ad free episodes, visit our website www.tinyterrorspod.com.

D

Follow us on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook at Tiny Terrors Pod.

Mark

Or join the Pulp Audio Discord by clicking the link in the description below.

D

Rate and review us on Spotify and Apple.

Mark

And finally, thanks for listening.

End Outro